The Dating Site
by RedEcho
Summary: Hermione helps Luna register on a dating site. It is far more complicated than it sounds.


**Hey there!**

**I have written another one-shot! As you probably already know, one of the main characters is Luna, I really really love Luna. She is such a spontaneous and weird person. The fact that she was called "Loony Lovegood" surprises me, I would've become her friend immediately!**

**Disclaimer: Don't own anything.**

"Luna!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Hi Hermione." The blonde girl responded softly.

"Bloody Merlin, you scared me. What are you doing here?!" Hermione quickly interrogated herself if she had ever told her friend to pass by her house, she thought and thought but no memory came.

"You told me you could help with... my dating problem."

"Oh. Oh yes, of course, now I remember. But you should've informed me that you would be coming. Right now is not a good time, I need to-"

Luna crossed her arms. "Please Hermione, nobody likes me! You promised that you would help me."

Hermione suddenly felt very guilty. Her friend did seem quite desperate. During Hogwarts Luna never had many friends, Hermione never understood why, sure sometimes she was a little bit strange but she was very sweet and loyal too. Hermione was proud to have her as a friend.

"I guess I could go shopping tomorrow."

Luna's face transformed. "Thank you thank you!" She flung her arms around Hermione's neck, hugging her tightly.

"So, how does this thing work?" Luna asked as soon as she had let go of Hermione.

"Well, it's called 'dating site' and muggles use it."

"You remember what a computer is, right?" Hermione asked as she took off her coat and her scarf.

Luna thought for a second and then nodded.

"Lets go sign you up." They passed Hermione's and Ron's bed room and entered the studio, Hermione quickly turned on the computer. Luna sat on the chair next to her and stared a the technologic object.

"Muggles use dating sites to meet new people, contact them and hopefully build a relationship with them."

"That's what I need." Luna commented, her voice was very gentle.

"But first we need to create a profile. I will ask you some questions, you will answer them so that the other singles can see what person you are like."

"Like an exam?"

"Ye- No, not an exam, just simple personal questions."

"Oh okay."

"First thing... Where were you born and when?"

"That's easy!"

Luna stayed silent.

"Luna?"

"Yes?"

"You have to answer me."

"But you know when and where I was born, I told you the second day we met!"

"Yes but-"

"Are you saying you don't remember?"

"No, that's-"

"But I remember yours. Fine then, I was born the 21 August in 1981."

Hermione sighed.

"Second question, how tall are you?"

"Not very tall... Maybe a little less than Ginny."

"Okay lets pass to the more personal information." Hermione scrolled down.

"What's your relationship status? You have to chose from these five."

"Widowed? That must be terrible! Put never married. "

"We have to chose your profession."

"But there isn't auror here." Luna noticed.

"We'll have to say you are a police officer." Hermione said.

"But I'm not a police officer." Luna replied stubbornly.

"It's the closest thing, there is nothing else."

"This is lying, my relationship should be true."

"You will tell him eventually, just not here." Luna seemed unconvinced.

"Hair length. " Hermione continued.

"Short."

"Your hair is definitely long!"

"He will find out eventually."

"Oh sweet- This is different Luna! You can't just say that you are a witch on a muggle site!"

Luna stared at her curiously then she looked at her hair. "Fine, long. And blonde, click blonde too."

"Eyes: light blue." Hermione said. "Your personality, choose one of these adjectives."

"Umm... Maybe generous... No no put friendly, but if I put friendly does it seem that I am trying to hard?"

"No it-"

"Maybe I should choose calm, but do guys think calm is boring?" Luna said dreamily.

"You aren't-"

"I should say I'm adventurous!"

"Yes, lets put-"

"But-" Luna started.

"Just decide already!" Hermione snapped. Luna's eyes went wide.

"All right, put um...spontaneous?"

"Perfect."

"Do you smoke?" Hermione added.

"Smoke? What's smoke?"

"Okay, lets put no."

"What are your hobbies? You can choose more than one."

"More than one? That's great!"

"I love gardening, nature too, and friends, I love going out with my friends. And reading, writing and drawing too." Luna paused. "What now?"

"Now we have to fill in your bio." Hermione replied. "Lets start with you introducing yourself."

"Okay, could you start writing 'Hi, I am Luna, I am 26 years old and I live in London.' Is that good?" Luna asked.

"Excellent Luna."

"Well, 'I was born on August 21 and I went to Hogwar-'"

"No, no, no; this is a muggle site remember? Don't tell muggles about Hogwarts!"

"Am I supposed to lie again? I don't like lying and I am no good at it. Do you know an English muggle boarding school?"

"What if you don't tell which school you went to?"

"Sounds a little suspicious but... I guess that could be okay..." Luna seemed slightly disappointed.

"'I was born on August 21 and... I like spending time with my friends?'" She tried.

Hermione tapped on the keyboard.

"So I can't say that I'm looking for Nargles?" Luna asked doubtfully in her usual dreamy voice.

"Not if you don't want to be seen as a weird woman. Muggles don't even know what Nargles are, they have no idea they exist."

Luna gasped. "They don't?"

Hermione shook her head.

"Should we leave it like this?"

"We only wrote that?"

"The rest they will ask you in chat." Hermione explained.

"Okay last thing is your profile photo." She continued.

"A photo?"

"Smile, look in this little camera here and click the mouse when you are ready."

"Click the mouse?!"

Hermione raised the computer mouse."It's this little object. It's not real I promise." She said as she got out of the picture frame.

"Oh it looks like a mirror." Luna commented.

After a minute of looking at Luna staring at herself on the screen, Hermione leaned closer.

"Luna?"

"Yes?"

"You have to click the mouse."

"But I'm not ready." She explained. "I don't like this I wish I had brought my Lion hat! I look so dull."

"Should I tie my hair up?"

"No, loose is fine."

"Do you happen to have an Eagle hat I can borrow for the photo?"

"For Merlin's sake Luna! Take the damn photo!"

"Somebody is in a cranky mood today." Luna mumbled.

_Click_

"Why isn't the picture moving?"

"Muggles picture don't move. So what do you think?"

"Mhm... I don't know... Let me take one more."

_Click_

Hermione snorted.

"Hey!"

"Sorry! It's just you are so serious and you sort of look like a murderer." By the end of the phrase she was laughing.

Luna looked at the photo again, she tried to suffocate a chuckle in vain.

"Iguessyourright." Luna managed to gasp out, still laughing.

Ron arrived home right at that moment, he tiptoed to the studio and saw Luna and Hermione loudly laughing. He smiled at the two pair of friends and silently went to the kitchen.

**I hope you liked it and that it didn't bore you too much. I made up Luna's birthday even though the year is right. I'm sorry if you found grammar mistakes or whatever, I try my best to fix them before publishing but some may slip pass me. If you have some advice for my writing please leave a review, they always help!**

**Thanks for reading!**


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